If you are reading this, then I would say congratulations are probably in order as you are probably a fresh high school graduate or a soon-to-be high school graduate, and you are about to go off to college here real soon. I assume you are probably thinking about what college life will look like for you, and you are thinking that maybe rushing a sorority might be right for you. Girl, I totally get it. Trust me; I have been you.
College is a scary thing. You are likely moving away (at least a little) from your parents, grandparents, friends, community, and basically everything you have been used to your whole life. And you think that rushing a sorority would be a great way to make some friends, meet new people, and build a community really fast.
AND THIS IS SO TRUE.
Sororities are a great way to meet people, find friends fast, get involved on campus, and ultimately build a great foundation for your college years and beyond.
However, there are some harsh truths that I think you should know before jumping into a sorority.
This entire post is about my personal experience with a sorority. This is not reflective of the entirety of the chapter, sorority, or university where I was a member.
Sororities are Expensive
I will just start with one of the most obvious things. Sororities are really freaking expensive. On average, sorority membership dues can be between $1,000 and $4,750 per semester. This is a pretty wide range, but all in all, it costs money, and it can cost even more than that, depending on whether or not you decide to live in the provided sorority housing.
My sorority dues were around $750 per semester, but keep in mind that my university did not have sorority houses, and I did not live in any provided housing. However, if you attend a school like the University of Alabama, for example, and decide to live in a sorority house, it can cost up to $10,422 per semester. Depending on where you go and how much you receive in scholarships, this is almost like another tuition payment.
It is worth mentioning what you are paying for, which does get you. First off, events on events on events. There are so many events that a sorority has. From socials, swaps, formals, sisterhood events, chapter dinners, etc. There is always something to be doing with your sorority, so that is something to keep in mind. If you like events like this, then you will never ever be bored.
Additionally, if you do attend a school that has sorority houses, they usually have a chief who cooks 3 meals a day for the house. While this usually costs extra on top of your dues, take it from me, I would have loved having somewhere to go at any time for any meal and having something to eat that is likely better than the dining hall food. Something to keep in mind is that this is usually something you have to pay extra for, but I think it would be completely worth it!
Overall, sororities cost money, but if you feel you can afford them or your parents are willing to help fund them, that is amazing. However, the cost is worth considering because it can be substantial.
- If you do not get involved early, it can be really hard to make friends
Let’s call a spade a spade: Sororities are essentially paying for friends, and there is nothing wrong with this. However, you have to put in the effort to make friends; you just do not make said friends by just being a member. Again, this is probably something that is super specific to my situation.
However, I started college in a very demanding major, not to mention that my freshman year was in the fall of 2020, so it was just the beginning of coming out on the other side of COVID. Recruitment was online, and so were all of my classes. So, I spent A LOT of time in my dorm room. I had a 4-hour class on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and then we would have assignments due 36 hours after that, and the assignments were extremely time-consuming.
I am a Type-A perfectionist who values school and grades, and this worked against me quite a bit in this major. I hardly slept, ate, or showered, so I most certainly did not make time to attend sorority events.
And this was a problem. The first couple of months of being a sorority is all about events. One of the events we had was something called swaps, which are themed events with other member classes in your sorority, other sororities, and fraternities. I only ever went to 3 of these, and there were probably 25 of these within my first semester. I would have had a great time if I had gone, but I just found it extremely difficult to get to these events on top of all the other required events, which I will get to soon.
I eventually changed my major, and I finally had some free time. But it was not until my sophomore year, and I was super excited cause I thought this meant I would attend so many more events and finally have friends in my sorority. However, I did not at all. I found out everyone had already made their friends.
In the beginning, everyone is scared and does not know anyone, so you know you are all in the same boat. But a year into it, people have developed real relationships by this time, so it was super hard to work my way into these situations after I was so clearly removed my freshman year. Personally, I blame myself a lot for this cause I should have put myself out there more, but it was so hard when I felt there was no room for me in some of these friendship groups.
The lesson to be learned from this: If you are pursuing a rigorous degree, or maybe you really care about your grades, or you may have to study a lot more than the average person, make time for the events, or do not rush a sorority. I do not want that to seem harsh, but if you do not, go and meet people. Trust me, you will have a lot of FOMO and still not receive any of the benefits. The point, as I mentioned, is to make friends and build community, and you cannot make friends or build community if you do not put yourself out there and go to the events.
There are a lot of commitments
Events
You know how I mentioned there are a lot of events. Well, there are A LOT of social events, and a good amount of them are required. Let me list a few for you: chapter (weekly), required events, or you will get fined, events you have to attend, or, again, you will get fined, or you have to get a certain amount of community service hours per semester.
I feel like I should point out that every sorority is different. Some are more lenient than others. I had friends in other sororities who did not have to attend the same events as me and/or did not suffer the same consequences.
Anyways, this kind of gets back to the expensive part because you can technically get fined if you do not attend certain events that are “required.” You can usually get excused from these events, but it can be really hard sometimes to get these.
So, the number of events you have to attend each week, month, and semester is really something that should be considered. If you want to be tied down one night of the week every week because you have to attend a chapter, then that is okay and good cause you likely will be. It is just something to be considered if you do not always want to have to go somewhere and do something.
Academic Requirements
There is a certain academic achievements you must maintain to be and stay in a sorority. This varies from sorority to sorority. However, a good general guideline is a minimum GPA requirement of 2.70 to 3.00.
Sororities usually provide resources to help their members meet and maintain these exceptions. For example, there are usually study groups to participate in and/or dedicated study rooms in the library or in the sorority facilities.
In addition, there are also positions in the sorority, particularly for this reason. Their job is to encourage members to keep their grades up and know where they can come for academic support.
They do usually reward people who take these academic achievements seriously. My sorority, in particular, would reward those who made the Dean’s List each semester with a nice event that is usually like a cute brunch or something. Additionally, we would do a raffle weekly for people who had gotten A’s on tests that past week.
Social Media
Sororities usually have someone who monitors members’ social media platforms. For example, if you post a picture with alcohol and you are underage, you will likely receive a text or call telling you to remove the picture from your account immediately. Personally, I am not sure if there are any punishments beyond that because I never wanted to find out, but I am almost positive you do not get off scot-free.
Dry Period
College can be a lot about partying, and some sorority girls do a lot of drinking. Nothing wrong with that. However, sometimes sororities try to dedicate when and where you can drink. For example, recruitment usually lasts a short period. You are not really supposed to drink at all; however, they obviously cannot stop you in your own home. But you definitely are not supposed to be at the bars or out in public drinking. While this is intended to be for your own good, it can be quite annoying to be told what to do all the time.
Recruitment (Recruiting as a Member)
If you want to test yourself as a person, sorority recruitment is a great opportunity. I am not joking when I say recruitment was some of the hardest ten days of my life. The days were long and extremely exhausting. Not to mention, you had to talk to a bunch of different girls for about nine hours straight. While most of the girls were amazing, it got a lot, day after day. In addition to all of this, you also have to show up looking your best every day and then usually scream and chat cheers for the potential new members as they walk in.
Recruitment is an extremely important time for sororities, so everyone is on edge. Every sorority wants the best girls, and sometimes, that can make people a little catty.
One of the hardest things I had to deal with during recruitment was being told what to do all the time by girls who were not much older than me or the same age. I know this sounds bad, but in my experience, I felt like there was a lot of time and effort of recruitment put into the wrong things, and I felt like it was taken out on the members recruiting by some of the executive committee. I could go on a lot more about this, and maybe I will in a future post. But the moral of the story is that recruitment as a member of a sorority can be a really hard time. It is also a fun time, but it can really test you, so just beware.
Sorority Girls will be Girls
There’s something uniquely special about the bond of sisterhood in a sorority. When people say “girls will be girls,” it’s often used lightheartedly—but in a sorority, it can take on different meanings. Yes, it’s laughing late into the night over silly inside jokes and sharing unforgettable moments during events, but it’s also dealing with the inevitable ups and downs that come with living, learning, and growing together.
I would love to say that I had an amazing bond and experience with every girl in my sorority, but that was just not the case, or I would probably not even be writing this post, to be honest. There were girls I did not get along with, girls I did not like, girls I had no reason to talk to, etc.
That is just the truth!
Moral of the story: You will likely not like everyone in your sorority, you probably will not get along with everyone in your sorority, and you will probably get in an argument with at least one person in your sorority. Unfortunately, where there are girls, drama usually follows. The type of drama can vary, but there is usually always drama.
However, do not let me make you think that you will have no friends from your sorority or you will hate everyone cause that is NOT TRUE. You will meet a ton of friends if you rush a sorority and get involved. I am just trying to say it is not all going to rainbows and butterflies. There will be disagreements, misunderstandings, and moments where emotions run high. Sometimes, the bonds that start strong can be tested by drama or miscommunication, and navigating those challenges can be exhausting.
At the end of the day, girls will be girls, which means that there will be moments when things get messy, and sometimes, things don’t feel perfect. But that’s where the growth happens. Learning to handle those moments with grace, empathy, and understanding is a crucial part of the sorority experience and, ultimately, life.
Sorority Recruitment is Cutthroat
I am not going to lie that going through recruitment as a young and scared freshman was not an easy time for me. I woke up one morning from being dropped from 16 of the 18 sororities at my university.
Talk about a gut punch.
That was a hard day. I did not feel enough. I also dropped out of recruitment.
However, I stayed because I wanted to trust the process.
In the end, I did end up rushing a sorority.
However, that did not make it hard to feel like I was not good enough for some of the sororities. That is kind of the point; you can only rush one sorority in the end. So, you have to get dropped from all of them at some point.
I also think I should mention that, again, I was a COVID-19 freshman, so my entire recruitment was online and virtual. While I do think I ended up where I was supposed to be, I think I would have had a different experience if it had been in person.
If you are going through traditional recruitment, I think it is important to prepare yourself for these feelings because you will likely feel them at some point. Your favorite house dropped you off, or you do not have a full schedule. There will be something, so you need to prepare and know that you are enough, whether that one sorority drops you off or not.
I also wanted to mention that there is something called continuous open bidding, which is where sororities who did not fill all their spots in recruitment open it up to girls who either did not go through recruitment, maybe got dropped, or did not accept a bid. This allows them to do more casual recruiting. For example, you might go have coffee with someone from the sorority, and then they may offer you a bid.
This is an option I wish I had known about because it would have allowed me to maybe only talk to sororities that I would have been interested in rushing
Another option is just to rush your sophomore year once you have had a year to be on your campus to really determine if sorority life is for you or not.
There are so many other ways to get involved
College campuses are filled with hundreds of clubs with which to get involved. However, I think girls tend to forget this or not know the ample amount of opportunities when they decide to rush to a sorority.
I will tell you how I chose to get more involved on campus and where most of my friends from college came from.
I was an ambassador for my degree program. This was one of my favorite things because I loved getting to tell people about my program and why I was passionate about it. I got to show them around our building and tell them what I did in different classes I had and how I would use my degree. I ended up getting really involved in this and was on the executive council during my senior year.
I worked a part-time job on campus. I met so many friends through this, just from constantly being on campus and interacting with other students.
Those were probably the two biggest ways I chose to get involved on campus and probably the two things that had the greatest impact on my college experience.
However, there were so many more options that I could have chosen. I could have become a student recruiter and given campus tours to potential students, joined student government, become a university ambassador, joined a community service club where we helped the community, or found a club for a hobby I had, like the list, truly does go on and on.
The great thing about college campuses is that they are a melting pot, and there are so many people from different walks of life around you. So, there is something for everyone to be involved in, and if there is not, then you can create it.
There is this perspective that the only way to have a great college experience is to rush a sorority, and I just do not think this is the case. It is one way to have a great college experience, but there are so many other ways.
Conclusion
Rushing a sorority can be an incredible experience filled with meaningful connections, personal growth, and lifelong friendships. However, it’s important to recognize that it’s not always easy. From the financial burden to the demanding events and social pressures, there are challenges that come with sorority life.
If you decide to rush a sorority, be prepared to put in effort, manage your commitments, and navigate the complexities of group dynamics. It’s a journey that requires balance, self-awareness, and the ability to adapt.
Ultimately, sororities offer more than just social interactions—they provide a community, a support system, and a foundation for personal development. But remember, there are many other ways to create a fulfilling college experience, and what works best for you may look different from someone else’s path.
Whether you choose to rush or explore other opportunities, college is a time for growth, discovery, and building connections that will shape your future.
Sidebar
My sorority experience, while it was not how I pictured it, was still amazing. While I might not have made 100 lifelong best friends. I made 3 or 4. My big is one of the sweetest humans I have ever met, and she is still someone I talk to daily. (ily Ashlan) I would not take back my sorority experience because it has made me who I am today. I am writing this post for the confused, desperate, and scared soon-to-be college freshman like I was. If it helps even just one girl, then it is worth it to me!
Thank you so much for reading!
